Cabin Fever
by Jelly Queen
Summary: A blizzard is raging across Antarctica, and Max is bored out of her mind. That is, of course, until Nudge unleashes a new horror:The Weekly Ride! Will the Flock manage to survive? Will Bob the Jelly Blob consume all of humanity? Read to find out! FAX!


**Hi, people! It's me again, Angel! This is my first longer-than-a-oneshot fanfic, and I'd like to know what you think of it, so GET REVIEWING, ALREADY! I know Fang's a bit OOC, but still, keep on reading, 'cause the next chapter should be up in a week or so and they'll start writing the newspaper in that.**

**Also, I did not the 'Beastie' part, a big thanks to Pheonix Fanatic for that! Sorry I'm using it, but that was just to good to resist...**

**Claimer-o'-dissiness: I don't own Maximum Ride. Shocker, I know. Here, have a glass of water. Are you sure you'll be all right? I could get you a chair if you like. I know it's a big thing to understand, but you should manage...somehow...**

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><p><em><strong><span>Max's POV<span>**_

_Snap._

That was the sound of many minds breaking at once. More specifically, the Flock's minds.

" Oooooooooh! I want a hamster! Gazzy's a dinosaur Gazzy's a dinosaur Gazzy's a dinosaur why is he a dinosaur I want a dinosaur! Hippo milk is pink! Most people commit suicide on Mondays! Hot potato! Cold potato! What the crap? Potato!"

I sighed. When was this going to end? Ever since we had been blown from Miami to this little cabin in the middle of nowhere, we had all been going slowly insane listening to Nudge babbling about completely random things as we waited for the storm to finally dissipate. No one could go in or out until it was completely gone, and at the rate it was going that might be weeks. By which time I would have pulled out my spine and cheerfully beaten myself-or rather, Nudge- to death with it. And stomped on my eyeballs until they popped. And then duct-taped Nudge's mouth shut for the rest of her life. And swallowed one of Iggy's bombs to end this misery.

But I digress.

"NUDGE! Will you just shut UP! No one cares what colour hippo milk is! So just be quiet for once in your life and let us rest in peace before I KILL you! Or else!"

So much for the diplomatic approach. Thanks a lot, Ig. Looks like someone's thoughts were running on the same line as mine…

Fang sighed. "Look, maybe we should talk about something else. Or you could go post on the blog, Nudge! So long as it's not anything embarrassing about me. That way Iggy won't have to kill you. Okay?"

"Yeah! You know, one of your blogger people said we should start a show or something! Or a newspaper! Yeah, let's do that! And we could, like, discuss fashion advice and what kinds of nail polish to wear with different clothes and why Justin Bieber is the best pop star in the history of time and-"

Gazzy snorted. "Justin Bieber? Fashion advice? Please, spare us. I think I'll commit suicide before _that_happens. Justin Bieber has fleas! _And_ it's not even a Monday!"

Of course, the conversation immediately dissolved into accusations and defences about Nudge's new fashion show and Justin Bieber.

"Justin Bieber does NOT have fleas! You're just jealous of him, Gazzy! Admit it!"

"WHAT? Why would I be jealous of Justin Bieber? You're insane, Nudge. Angel! Doesn't Justin Bieber have fleas?"

"Well…"

"You TRAITOR! You're supposed to be on _my_ side! I bet YOU'RE just jealous of him too! HA! Justin Bieber rules and you know it!"

"No, I don'-"

"Bob the Jelly Blob is sitting in my pants!"

Everybody turned to stare at Iggy.

"Um, Ig? What are you talking about? Are you…feeling alright? Who's Bob the Jelly Blob? And why is he sitting in your pants?"

He gave a maniacal grin. "Never mind, Max. It's just something Ella said back in Arizona."

Oooooooooooookay, Ella was talking to Iggy about Bob the Jelly Blob? I don't think I want to know about this…

The Gasman cut in, abruptly bringing us back to reality. "So, what are we going to do here? 'Cause I ain't listening to Nudge babbling about hippo milk until this storm clears up. "

Total snorted loudly. "Gazzy's right, for once. What are we going to do while we're here? I think I'm getting cabin fever already, and we've barely been here two hours."

Angel agreed. "Yeah, Max! What are we going to do?"

Everybody looked at me, as Flock leader. What _were_ we going to do? Everything which would keep the Flock entertained for a long period of time involved either explosives or something illegal. Not good. I glanced at Fang, hoping for inspiration before I was left standing there like a big fat idiot. To my surprise, it was that little Voice in my head which spoke up first.

And if you don't think that was a weird sentence, you really need to reread it.

_Well, you could do that show Nudge was talking about and stick it on Fang's blog. That would keep them entertained for sure._

Nuh huh, Jeb. Not a chance! Nudge in charge of a fashion show is not a good idea._ Especially_ when Justin Bieber is concerned.

_I'm not Jeb, Max. You know that by now. Besides, it wouldn't have to be a fashion show, just a newspaper or something. And it would help spread the word about global warming. It could really help you to save the world._

Yeah, okay. Maybe that _would_ be helpful. But still, what would we write in it anyway? And even if these cryptic remarks about Jeb not being the Voice are true, which I doubt, who is he then, anyway? This is so confusing. I miss the old times when our relationship was simple: me constantly dedicated to finding out who it was, the Voice to giving me fortune-cookie advice and trying to convince me to save the world.

_Why yes, I do still attempt to give you to do that. The difference is that you don't listen anymore. And if you really want to know what to call me, you can address me as Justin._

Justin? That's an odd name. Seems like a know-it-all name, too. Very fitting.

_Thanks a lot, Max. Nice to know. At least it's better than Yolar or something. Or…Casablanca. Sabinal. Bemata. Pewart. Would you rather I was called Beastie? _

BEASTIE? If I had a mouthful of milk I would have spewed it right now. What kind of person calls their kid Beastie? And YOLAR? Pewart? Looks like the Voice(or Justin, apparently) has a natural tendency for strange names.

All of this took about 30 seconds' thought.

"Um, Max?" Angel prodded me cautiously. "I think Justin's right. We should do a newspaper!"

"Justin? Who's that?" Iggy sounded confused.

"None of your business," I amended hastily. "Nudge, we're going to invent a newspaper, okay? Only no posting stuff on it without asking someone first. And I'm going to proof-read it to make sure you don't invent stuff. Don't go over-the-top, alright? Everybody else can help write it too, and we'll stick it on Fang's blog every week. And if you mention Justin Bieber we're going to delete the whole thing."

Ignoring the Flock's mixed cheers and groans; I turned to Fang as he most sensible out of those present. "What do you think we should call it?"

He considered for a minute. "The Weekly Ride? I dunno, ask Nudge."

Immediately, Nudge burst into giggles. "The Weekly Ride? I like that! It's like Max's name but with Weekly in it and the Ride bit sounds cool 'cause it's, you know, _ride_ as in you ride a horse AND it means Maximum Ride and-"

"Okay, okay, we get it!" I insisted quickly before she went off on another Nudge-tangent. "So, we'll think over any columns or whatever we want to write in it and then we can come together tomorrow and combine them to form our first edition. Deal?"

"Deal!" the Flock chorused. Looks like tomorrow is when all the trouble is truly going to start.

You know, it's kinda sad when you start to leave cliff-hangers in your own mind…

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><p><strong>R&amp;R? Or Bob the Jelly Blob will get you too...<strong>


End file.
